Well. I wasn’t expecting to finish this edit of Part 2: Learning to Trust of “Tishta the Crystal Orb” so quickly. That’s what happens when I get sick. I spend all my time on Tishta, instead of trying to focus on work stuff. On Wednesday, I spent the evening in the ER—stomach pain of undetermined origin—where I passed my time editing. And then, since waves of pain kept interrupting my focus, I allowed myself keep editing during most of Thursday and Friday. If I could afford to work exclusively on the book, I think I would be done by the end of this coming week—only if the stomach pain doesn’t resolve itself and I wouldn’t wish that on myself.
The six chapters in Part 2 are where my characters get to know each other and build up some trust. Again, there were whole scenes that I only vaguely remembered writing—they were new in the second draft—so I had the pleasure of reading them with almost-new eyes.
I consolidated two scenes into other scenes, so the count went to 37 scenes. I still don’t like the way the scenes are split up in Chapter 11: Coltan’s Passion. Some of them are too short, and there are simply too many, at nine. I’ll have to readdress this on the next edit pass.
I guess I’ve been trimming words. The total word count went from 187,965 to 187,155. I was surprised since I have also fleshed out a few places where I was telling, instead of showing. Interestingly, the page count went up by three, but that’s probably due to new dialog—dialog is definitely less dense than when the narrator tells what is going on.
I like Part 2. Criften’s longing to be a simple farmer starts to come through—he never embraced being a wizard—as does some of his relationship with Eido. We learn a lot about Coltan and Gentu’s backstories as they become intimate and share their stories with each other. The children also tell some of the traumas they have experienced. This is the emotional stuff that I like.
Relationships start to solidify here. When someone risks his life to save yours, you start to trust him. This happens between Malcan and Coltan, after the first battle, where Coltan takes a dagger to the gut to protect Malcan. At the same time, Malcan is given a reminder that Coltan is not human. He still doesn’t feel comfortable trusting the vampire.
“Mar trusts him. So does Kano, but…” Malcan said.
When he paused, Criften said, “But?”
“All my instincts tell me I shouldn’t.”
The best part of editing this section was it includes one of my favorite scenes, “An Evergreen Grove.” This is where Coltan and Gentu really become bonded to each other, and their love blossoms. Can you imagine making love to a vampire oozing with that vampy sexual attraction?
“Coltan”—Gentu’s breaths came in heavy pants—“I’ve never done this before… with a man.”
Coltan smiled and stroked his cheek.
“Then I’ll show you how it’s done.”
I still feel like voyeur when I read this scene. In the first draft, I didn’t go into much detail. I was not brave enough. While I waited for that draft to be reviewed by my editor, Anne Bean, I wrote a backstory for Coltan. It’s something I plan to release after the second of The Wolf Dream Books, “Into the Wolf Dream.” In it, I gave life to Eido. It enabled me to write the scenes where Criften communicates with him, in his mind. I also learned to write sex scenes, since that’s what most of the story is about—Eido helping Coltan to separate sex from feeding. It gave me a lot of insight into Coltan that I included in the second draft of “Tishta.” And, I became more comfortable writing fairly explicitly about sex.
I’m excited to get into Part 3: Travels and Battles. As the title indicates, there are several battle scenes. I love battles.
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